Nate was really sick a few weeks ago and his sleeping got off-track. Our trip to New York this past weekend didn't help; he ended up sleeping in bed with us at night. Now we're home, and the hammer came down.
It is much harder this time than it was the first go-round. I was able to comfort myself last time with the understanding that nothing except the boob was going to comfort the little man. And it's true; if Stewart or I tried to rub his back, or hold and cuddle him, it just seriously pissed him off.
Now my mere presence can comfort him, and it's really hard to deny it to him. Plus I had the experience of him sleeping with us over the weekend, and it wasn't all bad. The sweetest part was when he'd claw his way into my arms, lay himself on top of me, and fall asleep on me.
Am I doing the right thing, having him in his own room? I was 100% sure before, but now I'm not. But I still think it's the lesser of two evils, so I stuck it out. He cried for about a half hour from 11 - 11:30, and that was it - woke up cheery at 7:15.
Will I regret this when I'm older, missing this sweet time with him? I might; I already do. I don't know. I'm making the decision that I hope is right, for him and for us. I know that's all I can do.